Follow your dream

While you are sitting out there in front of television set watching America's got talent or some sitcom or who-know's - what.. Someone there is following a dream and getting there.

Your dream is as big as it seems. The power of imagination takes it places. But you still want to sit down easy and just go with the flow. You know that you dont fit in here. This is not your place. You still procrastinate. Its so normal to just let your dreams just be - like some figments of your imagination. Why do we let something else take over? Circumstances ? (Blame it on them) Situations?? as synonymous but there is thin line of difference !! I will not explain cos you already know or will atleast think through..........

I will write more when i can..

Not my type!!!

When we say your not my type we really really mean it.

We don't mean to be rude or anything, we just mean "Your not our type". It has nothing to do with your "Cool quotient", "6 pack""Intelligence" "Math""Looks" "you being chubby""sex appeal". We are not shallow. We just feel that its not we do not like you but we dont see us getting anywhere.

We really cannot explain ! You know! Its like when you talk about sport -man "U", chelsea etc. See we do understand all of that but it doesn't work for us sometimes.

We know you are a breed - but something is not right, and when something is not right - we use the phrase "Your just not my type". The fact is that we don't know what it is . It becomes really awkward for us to give you an explanation cause we cannot explain and detail. And if you are looking for logic ! Its not happening.

It may stem from the smallest thing - "You don't talk enough" You talk but then you don't say the things we want you talk about. Just like you don't like us talking about Ex'es we don't find many conversations interesting :) (more to come!!!)

What they would never understand ...but always wonder

• Why we want to change cities even when you've all your life there.
• Why you wanna go out for a drink when you have all the freedom in your house to drink as many beers you want!
• Why a pair of shoes should cost you 6k when you can get a decent pair for 100 bucks.
• Why you need so many shoes??????? when you have two pairs.
• Why you cannot leave your cellphone! and what is it with messaging.
• How you waste your time watching baseless movie like some stupid couch potato -when there is so much you can do like COOK!
• Why you never ever want to enter the kitchen !
• Why you would wanna spend 60 bucks on a coffee....
• What plastic straps are !!! and why you wanna spend 500 bucks on a bra sale!
• How does one manage to wear a thong :).... more to come!!!
  

We are straight!!!!! ...

To all those who have doubts....

Here's a run down of how you need to understand us.

The Superwoman: This is the girl that ends up being you confidante for life. You have had your squabbles and now it is passe. You love her and she loves you. You dont have to explain to her cos its written all over your face.She know what goes on in your head. She also knows your deepest darkest secrets. She doesn't care about who you are what you have been upto. She loves you for what you and accepts you at face value. You have cried together - and you have laughed together and it couldnt get better. She could lie for you ...and if i wanted to rhyme - she would die for you. You don't have too many things in common. She is the only one you can share your wardrobe with. You need to call her the moment something is HAPPENING. She doesn't start the conversation with "Hey" . She is always around and there is never an explanation that you need to give her. She UNDERSTANDS.

The Office Love : You met this one at you work place. Initially you didn't get along . But one drink did it all. You start off as colleagues then realized you had so much in common that you are almost a mirror image of each other. Your relationship is pretty clandestine in nature lest your She-woman gets to know. She is your Friday buddy - over a drink, over a coffee doesnt matter. You can chit chat for hours cos you have a host of characters to talk about. And mind you we don't gossip - we discuss. She and you both know that Fridays and weekends are dedicated to each other. You know her friends and she knows yours. Again , she knows about most of the events in your life as you know in hers. When you talk about work she just knows what your talking about .You talk about the same things over and over again. It is a whole different love story.

The Sistah: This woman is your very own sibling. You have grown up together and there was a time she never understood you. Your top secret would go to mum straight away. She would spy on you till a point she gave up. Her reason - I love you and I don't want anyone in the world to hurt you. The protection syndrome. She pinched you and did some real nasty things that you would never forgive but have forgotten.She helped you with your math and physics or history and all the subjects you so naturally sucked at !!! You wore her hand me downs and were happy with them cos you never had to really buy stuff.. her shoes would never fit you though. Now things are different she is probably married and all she has not forgotten but she really does not have the time to keep a track of your boyfriends, parties and habits. You are closer now times have changed. You kinda GEL in a lot of ways and it is much much easier....

The soul sister: She is someone you do not really need to keep in touch with on a daily basis. You have lots to talk about. She gives you a different kind of understanding and that swhy you need her. You can talk to her about anything under the sun and she will have giggle giggle giggle . You can chat with her for hours on the phone talking about completely baseless things and laugh your ass out. The only way to hang up on a call is the door bell ringing or if there is an important call waiting.She is the funny one! She also for some reason shares your sun-sign so its like a marriage made in heaven . You do not get a chance to meet her very often . You say your not in a mood and she will be like "OK" . Take some "ME time"darling. There is an unexplained connection .She is as intense as you are or as shallow as you are!! both ways !! You don do things like shopping , dinners... all you do is coffees. You know that she will be your maid of honor and she is already making plans. Your life is hers too.. She see's it like one interesting story. :)


Ms. Sunshine: She is the office crush. You got to know slowly and steadily.She's adorable and smiles all the time.BLUSH BLUSH. She is the friend , philosopher and guide to most people. Her presence makes the air lighter . She is always around to mother you if you are clumsy. She's off with you on your lunch breaks, sleepovers, movies, shopping.Her smile is infectious and to notice her does not take too much effort. When she steps up to dance - there is grace and perfection. She has it all. She can cook tooooooo. And she has a story to tell.

Barbie Doll - Broken !

When I picked up the paper two days and read the piece on 12 yr old rape victim - I was livid.I could not get my mind off the article. How unfair or unjust can life be to her. And how can life be so cruel. Two whole years of repetitive abuse. I'm sure her mind doesn't function anymore. I am sure she has transformed her self into a sex machine - a play thing. Just like one of her barbies - where uncles/neighbours/ people no one actually spared. What were they thinking? What is it with this animal instinct and men!!!!! What makes a man _ RAPE. Im pretty sure that we know of just one case because we happen to read. What about those
millions of little children girls and boys who are sexually and mentally abused every other minute while the world is progressing with technology,thoughts,processes and system. Trauma would be an understatement to describe the exact emotion or feeling that little 10 yr old,12 yr old or 3 yr old is going through.

How can anybody transform these sick minds of the doers? Will there every be a control mechanism. Rape doesnt come with a warning - its an instinct.And it is not limited to a class/age in society. It is completely universally - and any man who has the itch and does not have the conscience wants wants to do it!But why a child I say. Its not like you do not have options to vent out your sexual frustration!!!!What kind of sadistic pleasure does a man derive from such a beastly act!!

My temporary BUCKETLIST

There are definitely different shades to
1. Opening a shack on the beach - getting people drunk :)
2. Teaching a bunch of kids somewhere
3. I would be happy backpacking travelling meeting people - working for the lonely planet.
4. Would love to go the world over tasting alcohol and smelling perfumes - a job on travel and living
5. Learning Art in a university in France/ Prague - anywhere in Europe actually.

Purposeful living :P

A few months ago , I had a an email from a stranger asking me to write a page on purposeful living - my perspective. I did write something but didnt finish the page. Last evening when chatting with a friend I suddenly wanted to to back complete the write up. I decidced against it and wanted to write afresh. Obviosuly the person who asked me to write the article expected a lot more that a mere penning down of my thoughts on the subject. When I really think about it and introspect on the question which stems out of the subject. What exactly is MY purpose in life!! And am I living my life to its true purpose. ?

I dont exactly know whether we were born for a purpose. Like " Save Humanity" or the likes. Purposeful living for me is simple! Bringing a smile to some face - my shopman, the watchman, the helper,my bus friends, the security guard who checks my pass ;P , every person who probably exchanges a smile along the way. It just a pretty nice feeling.

Yes yes, we do live by the paycheck - we do live by bills !! But that can be parked for moments. When i sit back and rewind my day for a bit and think about little things that made me happy are these little exchanges. ..(more to come)

The Hurt Locker

The Hurt Locker , when I heard it was nominated for the Oscars - and I was asked to get the movie so that we could watch it. I would hardly read reviews before I watched a movie cause reviews are spoilers and they tend to distort your perception and then you begin seeing things that you would probably never want to see.

So getting back to the movie directed by Ms.Bigelow. This movie has essentially bagged the award for best direct and she happens to be the first woman to win it.- the forerunners being Avatar etc. I haven't watched the later though. For a woman direct a war movie must be something. Im sure there are other women who've tried and tested bu making it to the oscars - really the first eh!

My first thought on the movie _ great watch. I totally liked it - even it meant just watch men defuse bombs. A brush with reality - epicentre - Painfully yes Baghdad.The trauma of war and terrorism in the face. People who live with it and handle it. Im thinking to myself - The soldier that bomb is so prepared to see death in the face. He cannot at any point in time step back and say he doesn't feel like it. He does not have a choice. He cannot bunk work or call in sick. Would he do it if he had a choice .My guess is no! That how he walks life.

I was also pretty taken by Beckham - the boy selling the DVD's . Pure innocence. He too falls prey to the disgusting routine of a suicide bomber. Such is life. When you are whining your petty miseries - there are loads of people who have horrible stories to tell.

Maybe there is more hurt than can be locked!!

Mondays and other days!

I am not sure how many of you like Mondays and it is general phobia that we all have and we loathe them. What i have realized that there is no escape to a Monday morning and you just gotta live with it. So wat does one do.. I just get through the day by cribbing about it every single day. Wish life was this one big holiday and you did get to do what you always wanted to .And what did you always want to do . The answer is I dunno! I have always been a confused person . TO the extent of being called a person with MPD. So I never know what i wanna do!
I envy people who have it all set and clear. People who do not get bothered, flustered by anything. People who are calm, composed! I want to be all of those. But how much I try, how much so ever I journal I do not get there. I have tried everything from meditation to morning jogs to make me feel better. But Mondays and all other days scare me!

The Prodigal

This is not a biblical representation of the prodigal son.. no its definitely not!

When I look back and wonder how much my country has changed in so many it makes me think if this change is for the better or for the worse. Of course its a two sided affair - that of pros' and cons . After a days work - now its easy to guess what i do - the first guess for most people who live in this city would be IT. And then since I don't want to explain too much and since I have very much succumbed to the rat race, I nod. The Indian Nod. Like most ordinary people I spend 12hrs at work including my travel time. So I speak for those thousands who are at this point in time on the greasy track running the race. The race means something to everybody. There is someone looking for a living and there another looking for life. So yes, we follow this rut everyday. We have lost our melancholy. At some point we have lost contact with ourselves. That's how shallow we are .Will we get farther or this is. Such is this polluted/defecated society full of lust/greed/lies and vitamin M. Now none of these are good or bad.
Spiders in our webs, we know not where our homes are. The eggs have hatched and the birds are out of their nests. Nest are empty and home coming is awaited. When all is lost the prodigal will return!!!

The green green grass....

I was on the morning shuttle and I saw this Old man wearing a Tee which read - God made grass - man made booze - whom do we trust :). Welcome to the stone age . An era which is not as historic as Bob Marley's but people are still tripping. The common man is ! The world of Lust - dust and drugs.So why.. no one knows. the thrill, the hallucination, the butterfly effect, the flight, the other world. The once tabooed herbal essence - grass - is today is the most commonly available upper. I personally do not feel you can get addicted to anything - it all depends on the feasibility/availability of the stuff. Most people I know , know where to get - illegal as it may be. Most people I know have atleast tried it once. These are smart,intelligent,creative people.

Now everybody has a first time and there is a general tendency to remember most of your firsts. - First girl/boy, date/ first love and blah. Very often once you take that plunge the first one that is - its the beginning of your story . From then on the story is yours.You make your story and every person you meet along the way has a story to tell. Sometimes your storty could be someone else's story. Similar stories - thats how you probably connect! In god we trust :)